I Dream of Panda

So for the past month, I've been having loads of dreams about my best friend, Amanda - or better known as Panda. For those of you who don't know this lovely lady, she's been my best friend since preschool... Literally.

It may be blurry, but there we are: In preschool standing near to one another. I'm third from the right in the back, and she's right in front of me. Oh, and Eric's next to me, the handsome devil.

I'm not entirely certain what brought on the obsessive dreaming of my bestie, probably the fact that I miss her or something pathetic like that. Anywho, I've been keeping her posted of my insane dreams of her, and she seems to enjoy them, and I promised her a blog post dedicated to these nighttime wanderings. So, here it is.

Panda Dream #1: The Razor Incident
    The dream began with me arriving at Panda's mom's house to swim one sunny, summer afternoon. I went into the basement bathroom to change into my suit as always when I suddenly realized I had completely forgotten to shave. Ugh.
   Fortunately, there is a shower in said bathroom which I opened to find a pile of razors just sitting, waiting to be utilized. I wasted no time in snatching one up, and getting started hacking away at the caveman-ish hairiness. Midway through - or really when I was almost done - I realized that what I was doing was not only mildly disgusting, but it was also pretty darn rude to use someone else's razor without asking; even if that person has been your best friend your entire life. So, I opened the door to see Panda waiting for me on the couch that used to sit right outside the bathroom door. I peeked out and said, "Hey Panda? I totally forgot to shave. Could I borrow a razor?".
  She immediately jumped up and responded with, "Sure! I'll go grab you a new one!" and darted off upstairs while I hung my head in shame. I expected her to tell me to use one of the many in the shower, but as per typical of Panda, she wanted me to have a new, clean razor to shave with.

  Feeling highly ashamed of myself, I waited for Panda to come back downstairs. When she did, I burst out in embarrassment, "Panda, I'm so sorry but I kind of already used one of the razors in the shower before I asked and realized how rude it was! I'm so so so sorry!"
  She just chuckled at me and said, "Em, it's ok! See? You can pop off the head and put a new one right on... No big deal!"
  I continued on with my apologies until she would hear no more of it and left the bathroom. I finished shaving and we went swimming with a whole bunch of people that I didn't know were even there.

I woke up from this extremely disconcerted that I had used someone else's razor without asking, thoroughly grossed out.

Panda Dream #2: The Trampoline

Very similar to the Razor Incident, I arrived at Amanda's house to hang out. Only I was in a hideous red swimming suit and everyone else was in normal clothes... except Panda. She had on a bathing suit top and jeans. Still a lot more normal looking than me. Anyway, when I got there, I went through the basement - like the last dream - but didn't stop at the bathroom this time. I went out into the backyard to find a trampoline where the pool actually is. The entire karaoke crew was there (See "Finally Facin' my Waterloo" post) as well as Nick, and some blonde guy I didn't know. They were all laying on the trampoline. I talked to blonde guy for awhile. He had good teeth and was nice enough, so I determined that he was good enough to date Panda. Why? I do not know.
Then panda came out of the house and we decided it was time to bounce. Which she and I did while everyone else continued to lay there. It was like a really big, really lame game of pop-corn.

When I talked to Panda about this, it turns out I may have been dreaming about a cute blonde guy who had been showing interest in her... even though I've never met the guy. Weird.

Panda Dream #3: Little Bo Panda and Her Cheese Problem
This one was the best by far. I was in no way involved and was just an observer to the scene. Picture this:
There is a giant, open, green pasture, very hilly: think "Sound of Music".

In said hilly, green pasture, is a herd of goats. That's right, goats.
In the middle of the herd of goats stands a very disgruntled looking Panda in a sky blue, Bo Peep dress with matching bonnet - as well as her very stylish black glasses.
She is doing her very best to milk the goats and is doing a pretty good job, considering she's never milked a goat as far as I know. However, she gets increasingly frustrated with the fact that the goats are producing milk instead of cheese.
                    Side Note: For those of you who read this blog and don't know Panda personally, you must know that she has a weird affection for cheese - she wrote an entire blog entry about it.
The more she tries, the more angry she gets at the goats for their lack of cheese making. She keeps tugging at the teats and shouting "WHY WON'T YOU MAKE CHEESE?!". She continues moving from goat to goat, milking and yelling.
It was absolutely hysterical. Here is an artistic adaptation of the dream:

Just imagine that they're goats instead of sheep and she's milking them and shouting at them instead of searching for them.

That was the entire dream. I could not tell you why on earth she was there, or why she was so desperate for cheese, but the story remains.

Panda Dream #4: Stylist Panda
This one happened last night.

So I heard that Panda got this great new job at a salon called Eclipse. They had pretty pale pink business cards that she had given me, so I went by to surprise her at work, and to try and get a job as a receptionist - knowing how I adore reception work, this is not all that surprising. As it turns out, she was not a receptionist as I had guessed, but rather a stylist! She came out and was all excited to see me and to show me her new job. She took me back to her work station which was gorgeous - pale pink and stainless steel with a nice leather chair for clients as well as a bench that opened up to reveal a stock of makeup and other various doo-dads. While I was looking at her amazing new work space, she came running over with hair extensions and exclaimed that she was going to do my hair for the receptionist interview that she just got for me. She stuck some extensions in my bangs and straightened/curled them so that they looked really pretty. I was really hoping to see the final product of me with long pretty hair as done by my bestie, but I woke up as soon as she was finished straightening my bangs.

She hasn't heard this one yet either, but it was a really fun dream. I was pretty bummed that it wasn't real.

Love you Panda!

Foot Guy

Ok so the weirdest thing pretty much ever happened to me the other day.

I hadn't seen Sam in an outrageously long time, so we got together when I got off work and after my hair appointment on Friday. I had run myself completely out of food because I didn't go grocery shopping for weeks... seriously, I even ran out of Ramen noodles - and that's just sad.

So first we went to Walgreens to pick up pictures and nail polish and then headed across the street to Aldi's. I was still in my work clothes, and I had to admit, I'd managed a pretty cute outfit that day: Black lace jacket over a black tank, crop length shorts with a black belt and some cute black NY&C wedges. I love walking around in heels, as anyone who knows me understands - even when I'm at work and have to stand on a ladder for hours in them (which is mildly frightening for those of you who've never tried).

These are the fabulous shoes in question.

Since I'd forgotten my list, Sam was going through the things I could possibly need as we passed them. When we got to milk, cheese, hot dogs, I heard someone behind me say, "Ma'am, your shoes are really cute!". I turned to see this middle aged, large, bald black man coming toward me. Sam and I had both looked so he goes, "I meant her" (pointing at me). "Can I see them?", confused I said "Sure!" and kicked up my foot so he could better see my shoes. 

He walked closer to me - meaning uncomfortably close and within my personal bubble - and said "You should really go barefoot"... uhmm Seriously?!

Completely baffled, I responded to that with, "Yeah, uhm, I don't really do that in public" to which he replied, "I'll go barefoot with you".

This is about the time Sam snapped out of her totally confused moment and said loudly, "Yeah, she doesn't believe in feet. We both hate feet." And with that, she toted me away.

Whispering nervously about the odd scene that had just taken place, we made our way through the canned goods and sodas. We arrived to the frozen stuff cooler just as Foot Guy was approaching on the other side. Trying to keep our cool, we continued our conversation with our heads down - completely engrossed in the frozen chicken and pizza before us.

"I'm sorry if I offended you earlier"

Seriously!? This guy was STILL talking to us?!

"Oh, it's ok" - which evidently was an invitation for him to return to his way-too-close proximity. He walked completely around the cooler, leaving his poor cart of groceries abandoned and stood within three feet of me again. Sam, meanwhile, is continuing her staring into the cooler.

"So we're still friends?"

"Uhm.. I guess so..."

"What's your name?"

Ugh. You have got to be kidding me. I knew Sam would bust out laughing if I gave him a fake name, so I just said, "Emily."

"Nice to meet you, Emily. I'm John" he held out his hand for me to shake.

"Uhh, nice to meet you too" I briefly shook his hand and then swiftly reached behind me to clamp down on Sam's arm and drag her back to me "and this is my best friend, Sam."

"Hi" disgruntled Sam said.

"So you guys are best friends? Can I be a part of that?"

WHAT?!?!?

"Uhm... You have to earn that BAHAHAHH!" and cackling madly, because when I'm nervous I don't know what else to do, we departed, leaving Foot Guy looking lost in our wake.

Sam and I didn't linger after the second encounter with Foot Guy, and we got out of there faster than my daddy at a shoe sale. Now Sam relentlessly calls me "Pretty Feet". What a great nickname... Sheesh!

On a completely different subject, last night was GREAT! I mean, my house still reeks of bleach from my cleaning binge yesterday, but I feel as cleansed as my house - which is a good thing to feel before the  start of another stressful semester. But post-cleaning, my favorite Tante and my mommy came down to visit/ for a Straight No Chaser concert that was happening at the River Campus. If you're somehow unfamiliar with Straight No Chaser, they're an A Capella group from Indiana University that's crazy famous. We got to hear the latest version (meaning the ones that are actually still in college) perform, and they were FANTASTIC. If you don't know them, here's a link to a really fun youtube video:

Straight No Chaser

So we went to dinner at Broussard's and filled up on wonderful Cajun food, and enjoyed a fun concert. Today, I went to get my books because classes start tomorrow. What garbage. I've barely had a break from classes. What's it been, ten days?! Dumb. Anywho, I'm starting Block II this semester which basically means I'm going to be in a school for an entire school day once a week. Oh and it also means that I have one, yes one, professor in one classroom for every class. Now, fortunately (depending on how you look at it), I'm also taking Earth Science this semester which is outside of Block II, so there's a whole different room with a different, however sciency, professor for two hours every Monday. But that's it.

Loads of fun, if you ask me - especially judging by the ridiculous volume of textbooks now sitting on my kitchen table. Even though I have one prof and one classroom, I have an amazing number of texts... and none of them are joking around, they're pretty encyclopedia-sized. Huzzah.

Wish me luck and sanity!

Love you all!

I love Guinea Pigs

hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!
I actually had a guinea pig for six years. His name was Butterscotch/ The Rat. He was awesome - he played hide and seek and slid down our slide. It was great until he died. :S

Anyway, I saw this and thought it was HILARIOUS